Arguing and disagreements however solid a relationship, will happen from time to time, and it’s not so much about we shouldn’t have arguments, but more of when we do, how we resolve them in a good way which is important.
There is no doubt that there is a collation about how a couple argue and how these are resolved, which help maintain a healthy relationship. Some things to think about next time you are in an argument:
• Choosing the best time and place – not having difficult or emotionally charged conversations if one of you is tired for example. Out in public might not be the best place either!
• Sticking to what the real issue is about – i.e. don’t make the argument about the washing up if the real issue is unsatisfactory sex!
• Listen to each others’ anger, disappointment, sadness, or whatever else they may be feeling and without interrupting.
• No one runs away – no one leaves before it has finished or goes silent, slams the doors or ‘uses’ tears.
• Physical, verbal and emotional abuse / violence is never acceptable and totally out.
• Avoid hitting below the belt – making it personal, dragging in others, name calling etc.
• Not bringing up grievances from the past.
• Not manipulating each other by withdrawing love or sex.
• Not trying to be a winner and making the other person feel the loser….but to find a way through together.
• Admit our mistakes, and start to look for a positive solution.
Thanks for reading and maybe you have some thoughts you could share about what you do in these situations and what helps. Jason
