We all like to think we are great listeners, but are we? research shows that actually we are generally quite poor at just listening, whether it’s because we feel criticised, feel we need to get our point across first or we are distracted by the television or more focused on our own thoughts these are all things which affect how effectively we listen.
Here is a few things to consider and see how good a listener you really are and are there things that you could be doing differently to improve your listening.
Are You Really Listening ?
Do I always interrupt?
Always —————————————————————————————————– Never
Do I really listen ‘between the lines’ when people are saying one thing but perhaps meaning something else ?
Always —————————————————————————————————– Never
Do I really concentrate and try to remember important information ?
Always —————————————————————————————————– Never
Do I have control of my emotions if someone else is angry or upset ?
Always —————————————————————————————————– Never
Do I always turn off the TV / Stop reading the paper when someone is talking to me ?
Always —————————————————————————————————– Never
Do I show people that I am interested, by giving eye contact and turning towards them ?
Always —————————————————————————————————– Never
Do I listen or do I wait for them to stop speaking before speaking myself ?
Always —————————————————————————————————– Never
Do I help others to express difficult feelings ?
Always —————————————————————————————————– Never
Do I always try to fix the problem, rather than just listen ?
Always —————————————————————————————————– Never
Do I check out with people if I am unsure how they have meant something before taking offence or getting upset ?
Always —————————————————————————————————– Never
Andrew
Interesting points and has made me think about what I could be doing to be listening more to my partner!